| I
have reason to believe my penis was exposed to LSD. When I ejaculate
I have flashbacks. |
 |
My
hair is falling out and the sun hurts my crotch. |
 |
I
went to a party, had a few beers, woke up in a closet later on
and my face stunk and my dick hurt. |
 |
I think my boyfriend knows what's going
on. He's been calling me a 'chlamydiahoris.'
|
 |
Customers see me itching down there and they don't
ask me for lap dances
|
 |
| My
last period looked like meat. |
 |
My
balls feel soft and mushy. |
 |
My
pee smells like ham. |
 |
I
have food chunks in my urine.
|
 |
Had
sex with my daughter's fiancé and then douched with Lysol--feelin'
a little raw down there.
|
 |
| I
have open scabs on my butt and I'm losing my mind. |
 |
I'm
releasing semen when I take a crap. |
 |
I
was poked in the rectum with the infected finger of a 70-year-old
homosexual man. |
 |
I live at the VA and my roommate has his girlfriend
from Minneapolis over. They throw ticks at me that bite my neck
and when I pop the sores, they smell like vagina juice.
|
 |
I had sex with my baby's momma, sex with my other baby's momma
and my other new baby's momma has disease.
|
 |
| Can't
you put the swab in further and wiggle it around? |
 |
Last
time I had sex I passed something that looked like Cream of Wheat
before it's cooked. |
 |
My
cervix hurts when I jiggle. |
 |
The seam in my circumcision split open.
|
 |
My whole body smells like a menstruating skunk, especially
my armpits.
|
 |
| I
be messin' with my ex-wife and my girlfriend and I don't trust
either of them. |
 |
From
the looks of my penis, I believe they are sucking the adrenaline
out of me. |
 |
I
think they hypnotized me and put implants and poltergeists in
my brain and had sex with me. |
 |
I be messin' with these nasty women from Minnesota
and they don't tell you they got something unless they mad at
you.
|
 |
How am I supposed to do lap dances smelling like a
dead fish?
|
I got the dripper. |