MARCH 28, 2006 UNCLE URL writes... Hi Folks -- we've received a number of emails regarding small items being stuck to the wall by themselves, or hanging on the wall by themselves, always nearby or directly above or below one of our Magicshelves. They say it's pens, coins, photographs, even a coffee cup but the coffee cup has not been proven, in my opinion. The items let go and fall instantly after being touched. I can assure you there is no way Magicshelf should be causing this. I've inquired from each of the people who write for more details, and I've seen some photographs, but if this has happened to you, please let us know immediately. Meanwhile, we're going to be suspending the sale of Magicshelf until I can get to the bottom of this. I don't want to heap on more trouble if this turns out to be a thing. Uncle-Url@linkydinky.com http://www.magicalshelf.com * * * MARCH 31, 2006 UNCLE URL writes... Since I mentioned the emails about haunted Magicshelves causing small objects to jump up and stick to walls, we've gotten TONS MORE emails re-telling these same strange stories. A few of these letters were meant to "amuse" me, I'm sure, and you know who you are. But the others are REMARKABLE in that the SINGLE DETAIL I haven't revealed about this mystery is known to them, so I know their letters and experiences are real. (there is a small but important detail that I haven't told you, and that's so I can separate the real letters from the fans who just want to pull my leg.) I don't know which Magicshelfs are haunted. Maybe all of them, by one degree or another. The Magicshelf "effect", or haunting appears to be harmless, albeit terrifying. Our lawyer has ordered me into silence on this matter, but he doesn't read our newsletter. I'm for full transparency and openness in everything we do, but I'm not posting the pictures people have sent me, per his advice. About a dozen have come in and I'm saving them for now. One lady sent me a video. She set up a tripod and tape-recorded six hours over night of a wall in her house with a Magicshelf and a table of assorted small objects. It was like the objects were having a party, there was so much jumping and hopping around. She's in Sarasota, a short hop for me, I'm visiting her this weekend. I'll let you know. Uncle-Url@linkydinky.com http://www.magicalshelf.com * * * APRIL 3, 2006 UNCLE URL writes... I arrived at our Sarasota fan's home Sunday afternoon, and just at the right time because she had done some experimenting by moving the Magicshelf to a different wall in a different room to see if she could repeat "the big one". She could. I didn't actually see any items "jump up" to the wall like was on the video, but this time she was making anything she wanted "stick" to the wall just by placing it near the Magicshelf. We tried the toy army soldiers, and all you have to do is hold their feet or their bodies to the wall within about 12 inches of the Magicshelf and voila! It stays there. There was no glue or moisture or pins or nails or anything. While on the wall, and this is interesting, you didn't have to but barely touch them, with a finger or pencil or anything to make them fall. Whatever is holding them against gravity is only just exactly enough to do the job, and the slightest dislodgement will make them fall. It doesn't matter how heavy the object is, either, as long as it's close to the Magicshelf. Apparently the effect works in exact proportion to the item's weight. We know books will float while on the Magicshelf itself, but we tried a picture frame, 5x7 made of wood and a glass paperweight. Everything would stick to the wall without explanation if you just pressed it there and gently removed your grip on it. Again, it seemed to only work while within 12 inches top, bottom, left or right of the Magicshelf. The effect is definitely happening because of the Magicshelf. I can't fathom what. I wish we had a bowling ball to try, but I'm sure it would have held on too. After much discussion and a promise of "sharing the gain" I have her Magicshelf in my briefcase and I have an appointment with the Physics Dept. this Thursday at UF (University of Florida) to demonstrate and hopefully get some scientific answers -- or if not, we'll move it further up the educational/scientific food chain until we get some answers. Hopefully the Men in Black won't swoop in and steal it from me, but they can't possible take ALL the Magicshelves out there. Maybe this could be converted to a free energy source and radically change the future of mankind. That'd be great. More later! Uncle-Url@linkydinky.com http://www.magicalshelf.com * * * APRIL 7, 2006 UNCLE URL writes... So much has happened, I'm going to have to skip ahead. Yes, I met with Richard D. Fieldsman, head of the High Energy Group at the Physics Dept. at the Univ. of Florida. Long story short, he met me in a lab, and I was demonstrating how Magicshelf worked in the first place, and before I even finished setting it up he said "You're not using any shielding". Now, I'm no physics professor, but I knew that wasn't a good start, and it wasn't. It all got worse from there. So he retrieved a bunch of equipment and starting measuring fields and strengths and so forth and wrote down a bunch of numbers with slashes and backwards E's and dots-in-a-triangle and filled up a whole page of legal paper. His tone of voice became increasingly preachy and disapproving as he attempted to explain that when we welded the certain metal blah-blah-blah with the other type of metal blah-blah-blah, the heated joined area transformed into blah-blah-blah and with the coil and energy capacitor, well, what did we EXPECT would happen? "That's how they float the frog", he said. I interrupted with "excuse me, float the frog?" and he told me to look it up later. I did, it's here: http://www.hfml.ru.nl/froglev.html So I was in trouble with this guy. I thought he might turn us into the physics police. I told him a dozen different ways that we just wanted to create a floating bookshelf, and he just poo-poo'd me, and made some comment that we were like pre-school children playing with power tools. But about 45 minutes into this investigation, in which I stood by like a chump, he picked up the Magicshelf with tongs (imagine the expression on MY face) and carried it into another room and placed it into some machine that looked like a microwave oven to me. He did some more calculations and punched some buttons and we watched the screen make wavy lines. Something about the wavy lines made his mouth open and he stared at it for quite a few seconds. "How many of these did you sell?" he asked. "Uh, thousands. Many thousands," I answered. "How many people are reporting strange occurrences?" "I've received over 400 emails about it, but I actually believe only about 200 of them." The Professor put his hands on his hips, looked me dead in the eye, and said: "You must get them back! Every single one! These can't be in the hands of the public. This is going to become an issue of National Security!" (I'm exhausted, there's much more, but I'll write it up later.) Uncle-Url@linkydinky.com http://www.magicalshelf.com * * * APRIL 11, 2006 UNCLE URL writes... My poor feeble mind was racing on the car drive home. The professor wouldn't give me back the Magicshelf. He said: "I'm going to perform the due diligence YOU should have done before unleashing this thing on the world." It can't be that bad. Magicshelf is *supposed* to elevate items placed directly upon it, and if other small random articles happen to weave and hop and float around, what's the harm? So much the better, for entertainment, I say. But the fearful feeling tensing my stomach is worse than the time I got a letter from the IRS. The professor's comment about "national security" really bothered me. Common sense tells me that anything can be misused and converted into a weapon, but I couldn't figure out how a harmless little Magicshelf could be made destructive. The illustrious professor gave me no examples, and he backed off a bit on his demand that we recall all the Magicshelves (me thinks he's a bit of a dramatist). But the argument in my head proceeded, until I did what I always do, back up and start from the beginning, point by point: 1. THE ISSUE: Some MagicShelves are too strong (apparently) and extend their elevation field too far, having unpredictable effects on objects nearby. Why is this happening? Why some and not all? 2. THE CONSEQUENCES: Nothing, really. It has freaked people out, but if they knew (and believed) the effect was harmless, they would probably enjoy it. Giving them a comfort level about something that *I* don't have a comfort level with, is going to be a trick. We'll just announce we don't know, but no ill effects have been reported or seen by us. I should tell them to keep vigilant and report anything unusual right away. 3. INVESTIGATE FURTHER: On many of the PayPal orders, customers have entered their phone numbers. Maybe only 10%, but that's a good sample. I'll ring up a few dozen and ask them about their Magicshelves. (I've called fans in the past, it's a gas! They get really excited like I'm a celebrity or something. Such is faux fame on the internet...) 4. TEST: Many MANY people have purchased two or more Magicshelves. One lady bought 20. What if those Magicshelves were used side by side? Would the effect be twice as strong, or would it have a multiplying effect, as in two Magicshelves are 4 times as strong, 3 MagicShelves are 3x3x3 or 27 times as strong? A scary thought, but I can test that today. 5. CONCLUSION: The worst that can happen is we have to recall all Magicshelves for safety reasons (gulp). The best that can happen is we figure out what's causing the extraneous levitation and turn it off, or if it's proven safe, use it as a selling point! Who wouldn't want to own a "Magical Magnet"? ... that's enough. "Don't sell your Magical Magnets until they hatch" I always say (or will start to). The Professor is supposed to give me a update on his findings in a few days... I'll check back with you then. Uncle-Url@linkydinky.com http://www.magicalshelf.com * * * APRIL 14, 2006 UNCLE URL writes... When I pulled the car into our compound, there was still about an hour of daylight left. I crunched to a stop on the gravel driveway and stepped out of the car, to immediately hear hooting and hollering going on around the side of the house. Our house is big, three stories, but it's old, over a hundred years, and sounds go right through it if they're high-pitched enough. These were. So I knew it was Linky and Dinky, and since they'd been home alone for about five hours, I gathered something had been concocted -- a game, an experiment, or most likely just a mess, all in the pursuit of fun. From the fever and pitch of the voices, I judged this situation to be at DEFCON 3, not as bad as it could be, but more than I would like. I rounded the house and in about two microseconds knew I should have left instructions not to play with the MagicShelves. Because Linky was floating in the air, well over 12 feet high! -- sitting cross-legged on a 3x3 piece of plywood, reaching out awkwardly to grab the rope Dinky was trying to toss up, but couldn't reach. I headed that way at a gallop with a full-throated yell: "What in the world are you!? -- get down from! -- Linky sit still as you can! -- Stop throwing that rope, stop! Everybody stop! Wait! Hold on -- Linky balance yourself..." The HUGE concern was that Linky would continue to move higher, and I held my breath when I reached them, freezing still to see if he was gaining altitude. After a few seconds it didn't appear so. He WAS wobbling around, but fairly stable for the moment. (I may have left out an important detail -- the MagicShelves. There appeared to be about 20 MagicShelves attached to the bottom of the board Linky was floating on. It didn't take a rocket scientist to realize that the boys were experimenting with a new type of rocket science.) I barked orders at Dinky "Give me the rope -- go get the step ladder right now. Fast!". He set off. We had to get some connection to the ground up to Linky immediately, and an added four or five feet with the step ladder would certainly help. But my aim and distance was better than Dinky's; Linky caught the rope I tossed up on the second try. "Okay listen to me. I'm going to pull you down very very slowly, because if I go too fast the rope will tilt the board and you'll slide off." "o.k." I thought I heard him whimper. So I got him down in about a minute, the "lift" of the MagicShelves seemed to just about equal the weight of Linky and the board, which amounted to a very lucky equilibrium. * * * The boys are safe. The extra bedroom we call "The Factory", where we manufacture and ship the MagicShelves, is now padlocked. The makeshift flying carpet has been disassembled and each MagicShelf (26 of them!) has been returned to inventory. I honestly, truly, don't know what to do. This is the sort of situation in which MagicShelf is "safe when used as directed", but could be mis-purposed into a dangerous, and uncontrollable, tool of death. I just know the Government or the Military or NASA is going to come calling very soon. As it turned out, the black Suburbans were already on their way. Uncle-Url@linkydinky.com http://www.magicalshelf.com * * * APRIL 18, 2006 UNCLE URL writes... I consider my Roll Top Desk my sanctuary. It's old, it's heavy and oak solid, musty and waxy and full of memories and meanings. Sitting there I feel like I'm in a bubble, protected from problems, empowered by the perspective of our family's long lifespan through history. The desk was my father's, shipped over from London in 1910. The hidden compartment, the journal found within it and the incredible secrets revealed about our house and compound and the 100s of miles of seemingly unused government land which borders ours, is detailed in splendor in our book, The Shocking "True" Story of Linky & Dinky. If I spin around from the desk, I can look out the 3rd floor window and see only treetops in all directions, with a few cell towers and phone poles and power lines stringing paths through the greenery. But alas, I can hear things too, and I heard the gravel crunching in the driveway. I was about to hit the intercom to tell the boys the pizza man was here, when the gravel crunching got louder, and then the louder still (Pete's Speedy Pizza Pinto doesn't make that much noise). I stooped over and looked down: two police cars, three huge black Suburbans with red/blue lights flashing in the windshields, and what I can only call a 10-wheeler (a truck half the size of an 18-wheeler) were finding places to park in our front yard. It wasn't hard to figure out, they were here for the MagicShelves. They're going to take the MagicShelves. The professor spilled the beans. The meaning of the Suburbans was clear -- they meant Feds, the big truck meant confiscation, and the cops meant they mean it. The pounding on the front door started before I could make it down the stairs. As I rounded the bottom of the steps, I noticed the boys peeking through the main window, then they saw me and darted across the room, high-tailing it out the back -- but not Binky. He stood behind me as I opened the front door and tried to smile. I heard the rear screen door slam shut. The boys were gone. Good. "Yes? Hello?" my voice cracked a bit. Damn. "Are you 'Mr. Url'?" the first suit asked. He was the tallest, with about eight to ten more standing behind him, and more walking up. "Yes. What can I do for you?" I already knew. Believe it or not, it was something of a relief. Let them take the damn things, we'll live to enjoy another day, days like we had before MagicShelf became magical. "I have a search warrant issued by the Federal Circuit Court of the District of Columbia, to inspect the premises and seize all materials and documents related to your product 'MagicShelf'". He paused and looked at me, handing me a ream of papers, which I took. He continued to wait for me to speak (Feds, they know all the tricks and protocols.) "Uh..." I started. This was the make or break point. What I said next probably determined whether WE would be seized along with the MagicShelves or not. "Absolutely. Come on in. I'll show you where everything is." I backed up, opening the door all the way. Binky stumbled backwards behind me. "Thank you," Suit #1 said as he entered. The whole entourage piled in with him. "May I ask you and anyone else in the house to step outside and wait for our work to be complete? Who else is in the house?" "Well, two others, Linky and Dinky are here, but I think they went out back -- probably half-way to Georgia by now." I smiled at my joke. They didn't. "Very well," he said. As I side-stepped out the front door, dragging Binky with me, I noticed the suits made a bee-line to the left, directly to the MagicShelf bedroom. The "factory". They knew exactly where it was. How? Satellite surveillance? How long have they been watching us? After I few seconds I remembered I had padlocked the MagicShelf door, and I started to say "Wait, I've got a key..." but then I heard a metallic clinking and the lock dropping to the floor with a thud. They had a bolt-cutter and were already inside. Binky and I stood on the porch, and I went to a rocking chair to sit down. One of the policemen approached. I knew him, it was Officer Cassidy, a local. "Hi Url," he said, "I'm sorry this is all happening without so much warning," he extended his hand and I shook it. That little bit of civility and friendliness felt real good at that moment. He continued: "They showed up at the station about 20 minutes ago and ordered the Captain to have two patrols lead them here." He looked down at his shoes, then decided to take a seat in the chair opposite me. "It's about that floating invention of yours, isn't it?" "I would gather as much," I said, then turned to see the first of many boxes being carried out of the house, across the porch and down the steps into the big truck, which was now ramped up to the walkway." "They're fast, aren't they?" "There won't be any arrests, don't worry about that," Officer Cassidy informed me, obviously happy about it. "The chief asked about that specifically, and the one guy, the 'agent in charge' they call him, he said no arrests, as long as they received full cooperation." "I'm actually willing to cooperate more than they're letting me, but we can sit here and watch. I just hope they don't wreck the place." "Don't they have to have a reason to take our stuff?" Binky asked. "What law are we breaking?" "That's your Patriot Act in action," Officer Cassidy answered with a smirk. "All they have to do is attach the words 'national security' on a document and they can do anything they want, anywhere, to anybody." We learned a lot more about the Patriot Act that day. I was willing to let the MagicShelves go (not that I had a choice) but then they carted out our computers, laptops, backup drives... Uncle-Url@linkydinky.com http://www.magicalshelf.com * * * APRIL 21, 2006 UNCLE URL writes... Binky and I sat on the front porch watching all of our important earthly possessions leaving us in an unending stream of boxes. Officer Cassidy sat nearby, and he was a good friend, staying with us during this increasingly awful experience, but he was quiet, too. He had taken to reading the search and seizure paperwork thrust into my hand by the "agent in charge". I heard my name being whispered, and looking around, it was Linky, hunched down beside the porch, trying to get my attention. "Just come on up here boys, you won't be arrested." I waved he and Dinky up. "Url," Officer Cassidy said slowly, his faced scrunched, still reading the legal papers. "This stuff underneath just doesn't look right. It's about real estate..." "Uncle Url," Linky was suddenly standing next to me, "take a look at that truck. What do you see?" "Well, it's a white truck, and pretty soon it will contain all the MagicShelves and our computers and probably my Tom Swift book collection, too." "Look at the side, it was painted over... see?" Linky pointed to the truck. I stared at it, not recognizing his meaning, until... "Something big is written, or painted, underneath the white paint," I said. Officer Cassidy stood and moved toward me, "Url, look at these papers. They're not what they're supposed to be..." Linky pushed on, "the truck isn't a government truck at all, because you can read the giant blue 'Wal-Mart' logo underneath the white paint!" "These papers are bogus, I'm sure of it," Officer Cassidy said. "I'm calling for back-up," he tipped his face to his shoulder, to radio his request to the police station. I stood up next to him, and when he finished his coded remarks into the radio, I asked him, "Can you read the word 'Wal-Mart' on the side of the truck, like it's been painted over?" He looked, he saw, he tied the fake legal papers together with the Wal-Mart truck immediately. "This isn't a search, this is a robbery!" He grabbed me by the shoulder and pushed me toward the end of the porch, where stairs led off to a path to the woods. "Take everybody and hide in the woods. When the police back-up gets here, we're going to be making some arrests, and I'm sure these FBI frauds are armed." * * * It was quite the sight, huddling in the woods, watching, our hearts pounding, as the police swarmed all over, frog-marching the phoney FBI agents into the back of the squad cars. I only wish I had the video camera with me. I still had to answer a ton of questions, but the question I found the most fun was "Do you wish to press charges?" Of course I did! Couldn't wait to. The trial will be in a few months, and the prosecutor has explained to us that a Black Ops team from Wal-Mart was sent to steal our MagicShelves and the technology so they could sell it by the bazillions in the 6,000 Wal-Mart stores around the world. This was the first time they had been caught, but it's suspected that Wal-Mart Black Ops had similarly stolen technology for such items as the 99 cent knife-fork-plate-bowl-cup place setting in vivid colors, the carpet-on-cardboard cat climber, the 99 cent pink/blue toddler chairs, and the three dollar desktop clip-on personal fan. A current investigation is close to concluding in which Wal-Mart had substituted brand name medicines that had passed the expiration dates with repackaged generic medicines. We were told to expect a big to-do on 60 minutes about that! It's all over now, and we've put our stuff back in place, and the MagicShelf factory is humming once again. Yes, the MagicShelves will levitate small items near them, but it's fun, and the word is spreading. We won't sell over 20 MagicShelves to a single buyer, because the magic carpet concoction can be very very dangerous, but it can't be done with less than 20. What's going to happen to us next? I don't know, but something will. "Uncle Url" Uncle-Url@linkydinky.com http://www.linkydinky.com "I'm taking care of business for Linky & Dinky & Binky"